When I'm Not Looking

He is everything that I want when we're together.
His language is clean.
His morals are innocent.
His hands stay to himself.
He has no prejudices.
He is everything that my parents want as well.
But who is he when I'm not looking?
I see him sonetimes, with others.
He doesn't know I'm there.
He can't see me.
But I can see him.
He is different.
He swears.
He jokes about dirty things.
He's so touchy feely.
He cracks racist one-liners.
He isn't what my parents want at all.
He finally sees me, as I watch his true self.
He pauses.
I turn away.
I feel my heart rip in half.
I wonder how he feels.
Why is he so different when I'm not looking?