With New Memories Come New Feelings

So since I got some (a lot, actually) memory back, I've got some new feelings I have to deal with again. Especially memories about him. He was everything to me. My "first love" as well as best friend. He was also my first real heartbreak. For almost two years I kept my distance and didn't talk to him after he broke my heart. I finally got over him eight months before my concussion. An now I can only remember the boy I loved, not the boy who made me feel miserable. It's a terrible feeling, getting over someone and them falling for him again. It's like climbing a mountain and finally reaching the top, only finding yourself sliding back down and having to start all over. I have vivid images of us, the way we were. And then I have to remind myself of how we haven't spoken in a year and how I can't just go "hang out" with him and how I've fallen for him all over again. I need to remember the boy who broke my heart so I can protect myself from him.